When The Prize Is Right You Have Higher Chances To Overcome Social Anxiety
In this article I’ll be talking about rewarding yourself and how this concept can be used to win a battle over your social anxiety.
You see, whenever we want to accomplish something great we need something that would motivate us throughout the whole process. Everything that is worth achieving usually takes time and effort. It certainly isn’t given to us… at least not to most of us.
We actually have to go through a process that leads us to our end goal.
However, this process usually isn’t as straightforward as we would want. We usually have to deal with quite a few obstacles on the way to our end goal and these obstacles can push us back. Sometimes these obstacles push us back at square one. And sometimes this can be so demotivating that we quit pursuing our goals.
That’s why we need to have some reward system in place that allows us to stay motivated when the times get tough.
When there is a prize at the end of the road, you’ll be more excited to reach the end than you would be if there was no price at all.
Sure overcoming social anxiety is a prize in itself.
It’s probably the biggest prize you can ask for.
But the problem is that when you have social anxiety it’s hard to imagine how life without the anxiety looks like.
It’s hard to imagine how much better your life would be without your social phobia.
You can imagine how it would be without having these issues that you have right now.
You can imagine how it would be if you didn’t get all tense around other people. And you can imagine how it would be if you were able to function normally in all sorts of social situations.
However you can’t really FEEL how it would feel like to be anxiety free.
And since you can only imagine but can’t really feel it, you can easily lose the motivation and stop doing whatever you were doing to combat your anxiety.
Therefore it’s great if you find a way to reward yourself for what you’re doing.
Reward yourself for everything you do, not just for the end result.
Reward yourself for everything that somehow moves you further towards your goal… even when it feels like you’ve made a step back.
You see, sometimes when you do something regarding your social anxiety that makes you feel bad afterwards, you feel like you’ve made a step back. But you really didn’t.
You’ve been proactive and that’s what counts.
Even if it didn’t work, you’ve learned something.
You’ve learnt what doesn’t work and this allows you to change your approach in the future.
That’s how Thomas Edison was able to invent a modern light bulb that was efficient and lasted long enough.
He didn’t do it in his first attempt.
And he didn’t do it in his next attempt.
It’s actually believed that he made thousands of attempts before he finally came up with something that worked.
Now if you believe that it really took him that many attempts is actually irrelevant because it doesn’t really matter if he had to try one hundred times or one thousand times. Either way, it took him more than one try.
But what’s most important is the fact that every time he failed to come up with something that works, he found a new way not to do it.
He learnt what not to do next time if he wanted to succeed.
So every mistake or failure you make is actually a step forward. Maybe it isn’t exactly a straightforward step but at least it’s a step that allows you to make next step in the right direction.
So whenever you do something regarding overcoming your social anxiety, reward yourself afterwards.
And here’s the key.
Define the prize beforehand.
Know your prize before you make your next step.
This will allow you to have your eyes on the prize, which in turn will allow you to focus on something positive instead on how your anxiety makes you feel.
And over time you’ll notice that rewarding yourself helps you have a more positive attitude in life and this helps you feel better about yourself and the world around.
Your self-esteem will improve and you will get less and less anxious in social situations.
The worst thing you can do when you have social anxiety is to feel sorry for yourself. That kind of attitude gets you nowhere and the longer you feel sorry for yourself the more you get accustomed to that feeling.
And guess what! When you get accustomed to feeling sorry for yourself it gets harder to find a motivation to pull yourself out of it. And you got to pull yourself out of it if you want to take appropriate action and beat your anxiety.
So use each and every tool that helps you overcome your social anxiety.
Define a reward you will give to yourself every time that you make a step forward.
Make it something enjoyable. Make it something that will drive you forward and will make you want to take action. OK?