Do You Hide Yourself Behind Your Headphones?
Today I had to take the bus to visit my friend Simon because my wife needed the car to get to work in time.
So as I was sitting there on the bus I noticed how many people wear headphones and listen to music these days.
Well, almost everyone I looked at was listening to their iPods and had that distant look on their face.
Ah, the safety of the headphones.
It allows you to be in your own little world without having to deal with the real world around you.
When you wear your headphones, no one tries to ask you a question. No one tries to start up a conversation with you.
No one gets in your space.
Ah the safety of the headphones.
That’s exactly what I was doing when I was still going to college.
It’s certainly a great way to cope with your anxiety but unfortunately it maintains the status quo of your situation.
It keeps you comfortable in your comfort zone.
It keeps you away from the stimuli that can cause your anxiety to erupt.
But it also keeps you away from living your life to its fullest.
It keeps you away from making progress.
It’s a double-edged sword.
You think you’re safe wearing your headphones, but in reality you’re just being avoidant.
And if you want to defeat your social anxiety, you need to stop avoiding.
I know that’s probably not what you wanted to hear, but I need to be straight with you if I want to help you feel calm and collected in social situations that now cause you anxiety.
I’ve been there.
Avoiding social interaction of any kind seemed to be the easiest option for too many years of my life. And I will never get back these years.
You see, this avoiding behavior only feeds your anxiety.
And it’s never really that easy to avoid people.
It never feels completely safe.
You never know when you’re gonna meet someone you know.
You can never be sure that looking away will get you out of trouble and save you from having to get into conversation with them.
It’s only after you conquer that fear that you really feel safe.
And once you get started, things gradually become easier.
Conversations become pleasant and something you actually look forward to.
Life actually becomes easier!